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My brother Lee was an extraordinary
young man.
Lee had it all. In his final hours,
and without a tear, he told us
of a wonderful life of popularity,
girlfriends, money, a talent for
golf that had all the hallmarks
of a very promising career and
above all good looks. People often
say we look alike. And despite
his illness Lee went on to say
he wouldn't have ever wanted to
be anyone other than Lee Frame
and that he was excited to soon
be free.
Lee's strength and overwhelming
courage to the last leaves me
with a loss for words and enormously
proud to call myself his brother.
As I drove us all home on a warm
summer's day in July 2005 when
Lee was first diagnosed, he casually
made a steady stream of phone
calls to his friends while skipping
through the tracks of a Cat Stevens
CD, selecting one of his favourites,
'Father and Son'. "Yeah"
he said "It's cancer".
"Anyway, I'm throwing a barbecue
this evening at the house".
Even with the devastating news
a few weeks ago that there was
nothing further that could be
done for him, Lee's first thought
was not for himself but for how
he was going to break the news
to our brother Steven who he loved
and cared for so much.
I left the office that day, my
journey filled with dread as I
made my way to Lee. I asked myself
what can I possibly say to him
now? I'd had most of the answers
since he had been ill but this
one was going to get the better
of me. But I need not have worried.
As I threw my arms around him
I said "don't be scared Lee"
to which he replied, "I'm
not scared, I just can't loose
this battle after such a fight".
Lee had a way of making it right
for the rest of us.
We looked to Lee for comfort and
he never failed us.
Lee always said that out of all
us kids he was grateful to be
the one who was ill. He said he
was the only one who could handle
it, and he was right. We all have
our qualities but Lee had a fierce
determination, drive and an age
beyond his years. His maturity
and level headed approach took
him far in this world and I'm
sure will continue to do so in
the next. Lee was a fighter, he
never once complained or ever
questioned "Why me?".
We are thankful to you Lee for
making the past eighteen months
bearable by simply being the wonderful,
brave young man you were.
And as I've watched Lee in awe
through the highs and lows of
this difficult time I've asked
myself just where did he find
such courage and strength? What
could possibly keep him going
the way he did and in the face
of such adversity? It certainly
wasn't anything I was doing or
anything else that was immediately
obvious. And then in the final
moments of Lee's life it all became
clear. For stood opposite me at
his bedside was the woman who
brought us both into this world
and she was whispering to Lee,
to her own son, that it was time
for him to let go and she was
with him every step of the way
as she stroked his hair and gave
him the courage he needed to pass
from this life to the next and
finally be free from the punishing
schedule of drugs, tests, scans
and uncertainty. She is an inspiration
to us all, an incredible woman
and the very glue that holds our
family together. Without her we
would be lost.
Mum often says that Lee looked
up to me, but in actual fact it
was me that looked up to him and
it's all thanks to the truly amazing
woman that she is. Lee loved you
dearly Mum and would not have
been able to get through this
without you.
Lee's popularity is clearly evident
today. I was fortunate enough
to spend the first six months
with Lee during his treatment.
Those of you who knew Lee for
his golf, particularly from Donnington
Valley, may recognise me. Lee
gave me several lessons on the
course. If the head green keeper
is here today may I take this
opportunity to apologise for the
state I left the course in. And
thank you to whoever told Lee
he could use the petrol driven
buggy. Having thrashed it at warp
speed across the fairways on many
a summer's afternoon we very nearly
lost it in the pond on the 17th
and on more than one occasion.
Great fun.
Lee made some great friends through
the club and two in particular
that deserve a very special mention
today. These two guys went out
of their way to ensure a normality
for Lee and to treat him no differently
despite his problems. They were
responsible for achieving phenomenal
success in organising Lee's auction
before Christmas and if I can
ever say I have two friends as
good as you I will consider myself
blessed as Lee was. Adam Clayton
and Chris Clacey, you will always
be welcome in our home. You know
where we are.
I also know that if Mum and John
were able to stand here in front
of you today they would want to
thank some very special people
for their support.
Nanette and Andy. You've been
our friends for as long as I can
remember and have been through
this with us at every moment.
You've never let us down. Your
support and love to us all has
been unrivalled and you should
know we consider you both and
your three girls as part of our
family. It has been said recently
that you've both been like second
parents to Lee, Steven and Samantha.
Denise and Brian. You've both
been spectacular throughout Lee's
illness. Denise, you've supported
Mum on a daily basis and have
been her absolute rock from the
outset. It's not easy, I should
know, but you've always been there
and I know Mum would simply not
have been able to do this without
you.
Kath, as always you've been there.
Thank you so much.
There are other unsung hero's,
thank you also.
Lee,
we miss you terribly.
Until we meet again.
Your brother, Kevin.
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